Yet settled amidst mango trees, guarded by an aeta settlement area a mile or two from Nayong Pilipino is an ecotourism site called the Paradise Ranch and Zoocobia Fun Zoo. The kilometer-long Sacobia bridge serves as its marker, right after the Clarkfield exit of SCTEX (use the map, here, for directions on how to go there). Sentries guard the major intersections so there’s no reason to get lost.

We were there for an ocular inspection, in preparation for an educational tour that we’re organizing at GoTravelBliss Travel and Tours. Perfect excuse to mix work with leisure. Good time to discover that visits to Paradise Ranch and Zoocobia Fun Zoo should be done ideally early morning or late afternoon.

We arrived at Paradise Ranch around 4:00 p.m. The sun was still up and the temperate still a bit hot, although we could only imagine if we arrived here earlier, right after lunch. It’s really not a problem if we stayed in one area, the Zoocobia, the swimming pool or the boating lake, for instance. Touring and exploring the entire place takes a lot of walking and expends a lot of sweat, what we got by wanting to see too much with too little time.

An overnight stay would have given us enough time. Paradise Ranch allows overnight stay in its external, stand-alone units, like the Christmas House, or a dormitory-like arrangement in the main building, beside the swimming pool and the restaurant. The stand-alone accommodation would allow complete privacy, but would be a challenge to those used to room service, as there’s no in-house phone. This wouldn’t be a problem for the eco-tourism crowd drawn here. The per head cost of P1,200, which includes breakfast, lunch and dinner, gives a lot of bang for your buck. Plus the presence of comfortable accommodation amidst the sights, sounds and smell of nature is a treat enough.

There’s a river for boating and fishing, and an obstacle course that would suit team building or corporate outing. There’s a Butterfly Kingdom where guests are treated to the sight of colorful butterflies and the life cycle of these wonderful insects, complete with living, crawling caterpillars and pulsing pupa (chrysalis). There are various parks and gardens where guests could sneak into and relax in relative seclusion.

One garden in particular, the Garden Pavilion, stands out because of the pine trees that make it look like Tagaytay. It could also resemble Baguio. The staff sticks to the resemblance to Tagaytay because this is where a supposed Tagaytay scene between Dingdong Dantes and Marianne Rivera was shot. The tree that was planted, adopted and named after Dingdong is found at the bottom of the Garden Pavilion.

Allow us to burst any bubble of misimpression that this is one refined, fully-completed destination. It is not. It appears to be in the process of evolution. The dirt road, 2 kilometers more or less, that connects the main highway to the Paradise Ranch is a bit bumpy, most likely muddy when rain pours. Same thing would happen to the approximately half-kilometer dirt road that connects the Zoocobia, found at the entrance of Paradise Ranch, and the main building/swimming pool. New trees are being planted (you could sponsor a tree and pay a minimal amount, to pay for the personnel who would maintain it). A waterfalls is nearing completion. New areas are being cleared for expansion. The place would have something different the next time you visit.

We’re saying this to anticipate any disappointment for expecting too much. Let it be clear, however, that the existing structures and facilities would be sufficient to cater to a visitor’s needs. Even weddings are allowed, and had been held, at Paradise Ranch. Why not? It’s picture-perfect. The facilities are new and well-maintained. The place is clean. Flowers and trees abound. Fresh air. The staff are helpful, warm and courteous. Plus an entrance of P375 (Zoocobia + Paradise Ranch), with children below 3 feet free of charge, it’s worth the trip.

The Zoocobia zoo, on the other hand, doesn’t have half the animals as that of, say, Avilon Zoo, but it’s big enough and packed with activities and sights for the kids, that I gave up halfway and went back to the restaurant to wait for my companions.

The uphill walk towards the Butterfly Kingdom, the gardens and other attractions would be a breeze for kids, not for adults, unless they seek to break a sweat and lose some pounds. Those averse to walking and would want a quick visit could spend the entire time in the Zoocobia Fun Zoo. It’s at the left side immediately after entering the main gate. The parking area is found across the Zoocobia entrance.

Zoocobia Fun Zoo, which is derived from the combined name of the three mascots (Zooc, Cobi and Bia), is located on top of Sacobia Valley. It includes the Zoocobia Barn houses animals such as pigs, goats and camel. There are animal-feeding encounters, including love birds, ostrich and Southeast Asian bearcat. There’s a big-bird exhibit, not the one from Sesame Street, but various big birds in an open space for the kids to explore.

Learning is enhanced with actual experience. Zoocobia provides interaction with animals and engages them in fun learning activities. The main structure houses the Animal Bone and Skin Museum, where children can see animals in their skeletal glory properly labeled or gently brush away sand to reveal the bones, just like an archeologist (or what do you call that kind of scientist?). There’s the Philippine Pride exhibit, which showcases items such as the national bird and national fruit.

Get lost, as we did, in the Zoocobia Maze, or experience carts running downhill powered by nothing but gravity, the Zooc Ride. There’s a giant slide (or shall I say very tall and long slide, which, if you add flowing water, would be akin to Magellan’s Drop of Splash Island), adjacent to the children’s playground. There’s also a horse ride on standby, just in case the kids want more.

Wind down at the Zoocobia restaurant and bring home something from the Souvenir Shop. Fully exploring and running around Zoocobia, not to include the other areas of Paradise Ranch, would take around half a day. Bring an extra shirt. You and the kids would need it. Enjoy!

[See Map: Directions on how to get there]

I would say that the centerpiece of our weekend visit, at least for my son, is the Hill Mynah. We were wondering who was saying “Hi”. Then the same voice said, “Kumain ka na?” By the time we heard “Panget“, we already tracked down the culprit — the talking Mynah bird, black feathers with an orange beak and a yellow streak on its head, pretty much like a hair highlight of fashionistas (but unlike many of our homo sapien comrades, the yellow highlight on the Mynah looks great on it). Even without the label on the cage, you’ll still know its name. When you go there, ask “What’s your name?” You’ll be surprised to hear “Mynah”.

There are other familiar birds like the Ostrich and Flamingo. The long trip made me hungry and I thought the ostrich would probably make a nice lechon manok, er, ostrich. Some of us who are lucky enough to have grown in the province knows it’s wise to keep away from a mother hen when the chicks are around. Come too close and the hen will treat that as a threat to her children. What happens? Saw fighting cocks go at each other, with legs kicking and wings flapping? Mother hens do that too. Imagine if an ostrich behaves like that.

Anyway, there are many exotic names such as Pink Necked Green Pigeon, Victoria Crowned Pigeon, Metallic Pigeon, Pinon Imperial Pigeon, Ring-Necked Parakeet, White Capped Parrot, Black-Headed Caique, Mt. Apo Lory, Black-Capped Lory, Red-Billed Toucan, Blue and Gold Macaw (as well as other species of macaws). There are sinister-sounding names, like the Cut Throat Finch. In terms of color, there’s the beautiful Red Masked Conure. And no, please don’t ask for pictures of those birds; it’s always better for you to see the real thing.

Mankind’s relatives are also fairly represented in the Avilon Zoo.

There are orangutans and monkeys. An island surrounded by a electric-wired moat, just opposite the orangutan home, holds the Muller Gibbon, Agile Gibbon, Concolor Gibbon and Lar Gibbon. And perhaps just like mankind, animals probably suffer from  strange psychological disorders like identity crisis — like that animal in Avilon Zoo that can’t seem to decide whether its a mouse or a deer, the Balabac Mouse Deer. (Then again, mankind gave them that name).

Big cats, of course, are there. Persian Leopard, South American Jaguar, Siberian Tiger. The lions, though, were too shy to come out.  Then I spotted the Spotten Hyena, animals with strong biting force, although this hardly occupied my mind. The first thing I uttered upon seeing the hyenas is this – Mufasa . . . say it again, say it again. If you don’t recognize those lines, it’s ok. Just go see the animated movie Lion King with your kids. I suggest you should, just to see how funny hyenas could be, of course through the eyes of Walt Disney.

Avilon Zoo seemed very ordinary at first. The short walk from the entrance, with only a handful of ducks and some arapaimas in view, was far from spectacular. Then going up the slope and into the heart of the zoo, I realized that there’s so much to see and experience. The landscaping looks good and there’s a lot of clean, comfort rooms (that alone is impressive). It was a great place to see the animals up close (you know how a Red Pacu, Sun Bear or Malaysian Tapir looks like?). By the time we reached the part where the snakes are, we had to leave. We had no more time to see the rest of the place.

The Avilon Zoo is open on weekdays (8 a.m. to 5 p.m.) and weekends/holidays (8 a.m. to 6 pm). How much? Entrance fee is P250 for adults and children (the rate doesn’t apply for those who don’t exceed a certain height). How to go there? Getting to Avilon Zoo isn’t easy. You could try the directions posted at the Avilon Zoo website, but I saw little help from it. From Quezon Circle, we took the route through Katipunan (Quezon City), turned right under the flyover, took the first U-turn, drove straight to the Sta. Lucia Mall after the LRT station, took the first U-turn, right turn at the intersection with McDonald’s, then, from there, relied on the goodwill of people in asking for directions. We’ll need more time to retrace our steps. Those who are familiar with the directions are most welcome to help.

[See Map: Directions on how to go there. See also more details, ratings and reviews on Ark Avilon Zoo or Fun Ranch.]

We parked in front of Tiendesitas, which, at first, wasn’t a good idea because there’s some walking to do towards the Avilon Zoo. I grabbed the first parking slot available because I didn’t know if there are parking spaces right in front of the zoo (yes, there are). Still, the choice of parking turned out perfect because we ended up eating at Tiendesitas, which means we were near where we parked. Anyway, any parking-related stress soon vanished when we saw, and got in, the Ark Avilon.

[See also the Avilon Zoo in Rodriguez, Rizal.]

It was a crisp sunny day, and it would have really helped a lot if the weather was at least overcast, so that we could approximate how Noah (or Evan Almighty) felt when he went in his ark. To get in Ark Avilon, you either pay P200 per head (for 1 year-old kids and above) or help build the next ark (kidding about building the ark).

There were crocodiles, although I’m not really sure if they’re alligators. The Animal Channel made me realize that crocodiles are technically different from alligators, but thankfully I need not explain that to my two-year old son who’s the primary reason why I decided to drag my butt out of the couch and go to the Ark Avilon Zoo. There are tortoises and turtles, but it’s not really hard to tell which is which. Then there’s sushi, I mean, different kinds of fish — huge ones, I must say.

There are exotic birds. How do I know they’re exotic, you ask? Let’s see. Palawan Hornbill, Luzon Tarictic Hornbill, Egyptian Goose, Violet Touraco, Nicobar Pigeon and Helmeted Guineafowl.

The hard-to-pronounce names alone made me conclude they’re exotic, not that it matters anyway. The zoo also allows visitors to handle eagles, in the same way that the kids are allowed to ride the donkey and play with the rabbits.

It was my first time to see a chameleon and it was pleasantly surprising to find one beside me — while I was buying hotdog sandwiches and beverage. After the attendant handed me the bottle of water, he held out a cricket, dangled it in front of the chameleon, then whap. It’s gone. The cricket, I mean, and not the chameleon, which, of course, could change colors to hide itself. It was Animal Planet in the flesh.

Then there are the snakes. I’m not really fond of snakes and there’s quite a few that I’ve gunned down or hacked to death with a bolo. I’d hold a dead snake only by the tail, which is because I’d rather shoot them from a distance than hold them. Then I saw the yellow snake and, as images of sexy models with snakes around their sexy bodies flash through my (innocent) mind, I couldn’t resist the temptation of not having my photo taken with them. The snakes, l mean. Besides, I have to show my son, Enzo, that his father could handle snakes.

I’m really having a hard time selecting which photos to include in this blog. There’s just to many of them and there’s too little aloted space for this blog. There’s a lion, with the tigers, pumas, orangutans, bears and other animals, the names of which I should have written down so I won’t forget. Perhaps you could do that for me when you go there. I chose the colorful and more majestic tiger over the sleeping lion and the rest of the others.

It’s a bit hot at the Avilon Zoo, so better dress accordingly. Just beside Avilon Zoo is the Fun Ranch (website), which is perfect to complete my son’s day out. There are rides, but not really like those in the Enchanted Kingdom. It’s just enough to keep the little ones preoccupied, but I must say that the zoo should be the main destination.

Beside the Fun Ranch is Tiendesitas. Here, you could shop in bazaar-type outlets. There’s an open food court, which includes products under the One Town, One Product (OTOP) program of the government. You may want to support this project. I suggest Tita Lynn’s Flavored Suman, with its great tsokolate and coffee.

*How to get there? Ark Avilon Zoo, Fun Ranch and Tiendesitas are located along Ortigas Avenue Extension corner C5, Pasig City. It’s near Eastwood City, Libis and the Ortigas Center. See map and directions.